When 2008 brought a year full of crossroads and opportunities, I knew my future was in for one hell of a ride. Little did I know just what that meant- which I suppose is one of the beauties of life. I had a good feeling about 2009, and while it took a minute for me to see just what that good feeling was all about, it's been a great one now that it's here.
This year was a year of major discovery for me. Jam packed with, "That's why I always did that", "I want to change this", "This is the person I've tip toed around being". This was the year when every little aspect of who I've been discovering, "Ashley Wellington-Fahey" is since my adolesence, all came to surface.
Throughout my teens and the beginning of my twenties, I've been told I come across as, "mature for my age" (you say that to my good friends and they'd probably giggle in your face). Maybe so, however when you spend every single second of the day living with yourself, your thoughts, your emotions, your past, your present, your future you become your own worst critic. I may have come across as mature, but I was just like any other person in their twenties or perhaps thirties, forties, so on and so forth who felt like I had the tools in the tool shed but just wasn't quite sure how to make them work correctly which left me feeling young and naive on the inside.
I knew somewhere inside of me I felt strongly about the simple word, "believe". I knew positivity was powerful. I knew every heartache faced taught you a lesson. I knew that everyone has talents that deserve to be highlighted. I knew that you just have to roll with the punches of negative people. I knew that you have to put your best foot forward no matter what's going on around you. I knew that I had big plans for myself and my future. I knew I just needed to get out there and see things, travel more like I love doing. I knew I needed to be sincerely happy with my single life, a life that all singles should cherish. I knew I deserved better than what I was sometimes settling for. But, what I didn't know was how to bring all those "know-it-all" thoughts into action. I wasn't quite sure how to take the things I knew in my head and play them out in the real world... or for the sake of the metaphor I started with, I wasn't quite sure how to hammer the nail into wood.
But, somewhere in the middle of 2009 I finally learned to hit the nail on the head. I may have hammered a few nails in crookedly a couple of times in the learning process, and some nails may still be poking out a little too far, but I finally get it. I can sincerely say in 2009, I finally learned how to TRULY apply those aspects of my knowledge to my everyday life. And let me tell you, it's an amazing piece of intelligence.
So, to whoever is reading this, I hope 2009 brought to you as much knowledge as it brought to me, and if it didn't, I hope 2010 provides you the chance, while remembering, there's always 2011, 2012, 2013...... eventually we'll get it all sorted out.
Happy New Year.
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Some Things I've Learned in My 20's (an oldie but goodie)
I may only be 24, but I've learned a few of things so far...
I’ve learned that your twenties are turbulent, but also terrific.
I’ve learned that friends will come and go, but the truest of the true will always be there, and no matter how many “Facebook” friends you have, or how many people you run into that you may know, it’s the ones who’ve stood by you through thick, thin, good, bad, ugly and beautiful that matter the most.
I’ve learned that when your parents and teachers once said you can be anything you want to be, you truly can- all you have to do is believe it, and go after it and it will happen.
I’ve learned that the 20’s are a time of self-discovery and the realization that the person you are isn’t necessarily changing, but actually finding the potential that lies within you.
I’ve learned that one should never settle for anything less than a person who highlights and brings out the very best parts of you; the person who allows you to be who you are without any caution or thought. The person who respects you, is honest with you, and sees the deepest parts of you that even you sometimes forget are there.
I’ve learned that it’s important to surround yourself around the kind of people who are positive and uplifting and to steer clear of those who bring you down.
I’ve learned that life is essentially made of three doors: Past, Present, Future. It is best to keep the past locked and bolted, the present wide open and the future unlocked, faced towards your present with a sign that says, “Enter Here”.
I’ve learned that your events from your childhood can have a significant impact on your adulthood and it’s up to you to decide how you’d like to embrace it all.
I’ve learned that it’s ok to question religion and politics, and to decide for yourself what you believe to be true and fair without passing judgments or criticisms on others (I’ve also learned the last part is one of the hardest things for people to avoid doing).
I’ve learned to never forget what it is you deserve- whatever you feel that is.
I’ve learned that it’s best to face your demons and your fears head on and in the words of John Mayer, “Fear is a friend who’s misunderstood”.
I’ve learned that positivity gets you a long way, and I’ve also learned that it’s one of the hardest practices to follow when the going gets tough, but the fastest way to step out of it.
I’ve learned that every person who enters and leaves your life serves a purpose- there’s something to be gained from all relationships and friendships, and it’s up to you to decide what that purpose is.
I’ve learned that the only person you have control over is yourself, and to ever attempt to control anyone else or their life is simply the ego’s dissatisfaction with itself.
I’ve learned that stubbornness sucks, jealousy is useless, dishonesty gets you no where, manipulation is for the weak and at the end of the day, they all take you no where but to a place of discontentment with yourself.
I’ve learned that you can have everything you’ve ever wanted, your life could be right on par with where you’ve always pictured it. You can follow every single one of the things I’ve learned above, but you can never be truly satisfied with anything until you find happiness and contentment within yourself.
Lastly, I’ve learned that the words: Believe, Love, Kindness, Honesty, Integrity, Positivity and Happiness are also some of the main ingredients for a wonderful life- and if you ask me a wonderful life tastes pretty damn good.
I’ve learned that your twenties are turbulent, but also terrific.
I’ve learned that friends will come and go, but the truest of the true will always be there, and no matter how many “Facebook” friends you have, or how many people you run into that you may know, it’s the ones who’ve stood by you through thick, thin, good, bad, ugly and beautiful that matter the most.
I’ve learned that when your parents and teachers once said you can be anything you want to be, you truly can- all you have to do is believe it, and go after it and it will happen.
I’ve learned that the 20’s are a time of self-discovery and the realization that the person you are isn’t necessarily changing, but actually finding the potential that lies within you.
I’ve learned that one should never settle for anything less than a person who highlights and brings out the very best parts of you; the person who allows you to be who you are without any caution or thought. The person who respects you, is honest with you, and sees the deepest parts of you that even you sometimes forget are there.
I’ve learned that it’s important to surround yourself around the kind of people who are positive and uplifting and to steer clear of those who bring you down.
I’ve learned that life is essentially made of three doors: Past, Present, Future. It is best to keep the past locked and bolted, the present wide open and the future unlocked, faced towards your present with a sign that says, “Enter Here”.
I’ve learned that your events from your childhood can have a significant impact on your adulthood and it’s up to you to decide how you’d like to embrace it all.
I’ve learned that it’s ok to question religion and politics, and to decide for yourself what you believe to be true and fair without passing judgments or criticisms on others (I’ve also learned the last part is one of the hardest things for people to avoid doing).
I’ve learned to never forget what it is you deserve- whatever you feel that is.
I’ve learned that it’s best to face your demons and your fears head on and in the words of John Mayer, “Fear is a friend who’s misunderstood”.
I’ve learned that positivity gets you a long way, and I’ve also learned that it’s one of the hardest practices to follow when the going gets tough, but the fastest way to step out of it.
I’ve learned that every person who enters and leaves your life serves a purpose- there’s something to be gained from all relationships and friendships, and it’s up to you to decide what that purpose is.
I’ve learned that the only person you have control over is yourself, and to ever attempt to control anyone else or their life is simply the ego’s dissatisfaction with itself.
I’ve learned that stubbornness sucks, jealousy is useless, dishonesty gets you no where, manipulation is for the weak and at the end of the day, they all take you no where but to a place of discontentment with yourself.
I’ve learned that you can have everything you’ve ever wanted, your life could be right on par with where you’ve always pictured it. You can follow every single one of the things I’ve learned above, but you can never be truly satisfied with anything until you find happiness and contentment within yourself.
Lastly, I’ve learned that the words: Believe, Love, Kindness, Honesty, Integrity, Positivity and Happiness are also some of the main ingredients for a wonderful life- and if you ask me a wonderful life tastes pretty damn good.
Monday, December 28, 2009
Thoughts Become Things
Tonight I sat at a table, surrounded by some of my closest friends, taking in a moment of pure contentment, happily knowing they were not only a part of my life for the long haul, but a part of my life at that very moment. I mentioned to them that I decided I wanted to start writing in a personal blog. They didn't ask why, because, well, that's the kind of friends they are. They don't question my actions unless they sincerely find them ridiculous in which case, I trust their judgement. I continued to share my reasoning- stating in my wittingly mousey tone, "I have thoughts.. lots of thoughts, and I think it's time to start writing about them."
If you ask me, thoughts are a highly underestimated part of life, yet something that occurs just as much as a breath or a heartbeat. They encapsulate much of what we are going through at that very moment in our lives, can define who we are and what's brought us there at the millisecond they arise. They can control us, abandon us and transform us. To me, a thought is one of the most powerful aspects of the human mind.
What amazes me most about thoughts, is often times it's the ones that spend the most time in our 10 pound pile of spaghetti-like amazingness that has the most power over us. Spend a significant amount of time believing something negative- negative things will probably come your way. Spend more of your time turning negative thoughts into positive ones- you'll probably find yourself a bit more happy with a bit more encouraging things going on in your life. Tell yourself enough times that something will happen, then more than likely, something on some avenue or plane of that thought will happen.
So, as the saying goes... "Choose the good ones".
If you ask me, thoughts are a highly underestimated part of life, yet something that occurs just as much as a breath or a heartbeat. They encapsulate much of what we are going through at that very moment in our lives, can define who we are and what's brought us there at the millisecond they arise. They can control us, abandon us and transform us. To me, a thought is one of the most powerful aspects of the human mind.
What amazes me most about thoughts, is often times it's the ones that spend the most time in our 10 pound pile of spaghetti-like amazingness that has the most power over us. Spend a significant amount of time believing something negative- negative things will probably come your way. Spend more of your time turning negative thoughts into positive ones- you'll probably find yourself a bit more happy with a bit more encouraging things going on in your life. Tell yourself enough times that something will happen, then more than likely, something on some avenue or plane of that thought will happen.
So, as the saying goes... "Choose the good ones".
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